What is My Gender?
Nori's a Girl, but Suzu's a Boy?
A little confusing right? For anyone that's been following me closely enough, you know that I identify deeply with my character: Suzu. He is me, I am him. You know how it goes! I recently recieved a comment in my guestbook asking about my gender as "girl" and how it relates to Suzu as "boy". It's brought on this blog. Let me share with you the comment I recieved, as well as my answer.
Anonymous
June 19, 2026 at 11:13:50 AM
Suzu or Jack?:
suzu always
Which website theme is your favorite?:
pastel!
hello! i love your site! i just have a question im curious about, you dont have to answer if you dont want to! so youve often referred to suzu as basically you, so why is suzu always referred to as he/him when youre a girl yourself?
Replied on: June 19, 2026 at 11:41:21 AM
Hi there and thanks! :D I can answer, I've actually been thinking about writing a blog about this. I do identify, and was raised as a girl, but part of me has always felt like a boy. I don't feel entirely feminine on the inside--I feel masculine inside, but not enough to be dysphoric. I don't mind my body, but I'm not sure it's 100% aligned with my spirit. I believe in souls, and I think I have a masculine one. Suzu is connected to my soul more than any physical form I happen to have ended up in this time. Thanks for the interesting question. :) I might just have to write that blog post now.
Suzu was always a boy, since his conception circa 2012. I was eleven-years-old at the time, I wasn't thinking about it--a boy just felt right. So he was a prince! And his dad was a big mean king. And it was silly, but there was a lot of my soul in it. Too much. I blame One Piece or something. One of those damn anime! Made me put soul in my art!
I Feel Like a Boy
But I'm not dysphoric about my body. My body does it's job (for the most part). It's my soul that feels heavy with a masculine edge. Even as a child, I always felt boyish, not that I was a tomboy--not at all--I was very feminized in fact. I still remember once, my mom had cut my hair short, shorter than it had ever been. I must've been seven at the oldest, and I remember looking in the mirror, estatic, "I'm a boy!" I proclaimed. My family laughed and told me no, but I kept insisting, "I'm a boy!" I was happy about it. Not distressed. It nearly felt like a relief.
I think I hold a masculine spirit inside of a female body, but the masculine spirit likes the female body, so my soul ain't complainin'. Just a pinch. Sometimes it stings--and there's a deep part of me that wishes I were a guy. But I also like being a girl. And I love being hyperfeminine. So, I never plan to transition, personally--but you're obviously valid if you do!
Suzu is my Soul, Not my Body
While we do share all of our physical health problems and appearance (I was redheaded as a little kid), Suzu is more than our flesh can be. Suzu is my soul, personified, into a little gremlin boy--because I'm a little gremlin boy--in my heart. Really! Jokes aside--Suzu is the aching, angry, masculine inner child buried in my gut. He is me, I am him. I live through the character, I become him, I am him.
Not Everyone Believes in Souls
And that's okay. You can just consider me nonbinary if we're talking practically. But as a spiritual person, I do believe in souls, and I beileve they have energies. I believe a soul can be feminine, masculine, or somewhere all around, upsidedown, in between, however you like it. I believe I am a masculine soul in a feminine body. But if souls are too woowoo for youyou, just know you can always use any pronouns for me! I might even squeak if you call me by he/him.
So basically my gender is upsidedown boy-girl.
